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"I don't think the pink's a good look for you..."

“I hate it that mummy buys all our clothes�

I think I can hear Coco coming - he's in semi-retirement

"Why does everyone keep giving us Funny Looks."

I reckon Vivienne Westwood's definitely got it wrong this season

You know 'Arry, I just don't seem to find 'Last of the Summer Wine' funny anymore.

The floodgates were open to let anyone on Question Time, now.

So this customs official says "OK, make me laugh"

ACAS - the musical.

Coming down the stairs, Stephen Sondheim suddenly had an idea for a song

"Boy George spotted Busking."

So George Lucas just laughed and said I'd failed the audition for Star Wars Episode II

"You could've bought us suits for the wedding, but no... Normal clothes are never good enough for you, are they?"

Whilst the need for covert entry to Broadcasting House was undeniable, there was something ironic about the BNP's choice of disguise.

9. X Factor 2010 - the Irish twins decide to audition again

So this con artist sells me this car - and now the doors won't even fall off

"I know I said we should make ourselves stand out, but this isn't what I had in mind."

"So we're agreed: Jan Moir will not be invited to celebrate our civil partnership then"

I got this job in a porno film, until they found the shoes were false

Disappointed wannabes at the auditions for the Spice Girls reality show

I'm plain-clothes too, Constable, but it's my day off

I asked Vivienne for something subtle, classy and elegant.

Don't say yes if he asks you up in his balloon - it's all some publicity stunt

Tough audience. We'll have to get a better agent, should never have booked us for the Coulrophobia Society AGM.

Last pair I'm afraid, and I had to nudge some bird in a spotty dress out of the way.

I always get carried away whenever Primark has a sale

Hopefuls queue up for a chance to win a large cash prize if they manage to cure Lord Leavenworth IV of his hiccups.

"Pssss.... Don't look back, but there's a guy behind you with an orange balloon and wearing a ridiculous outfit..."

The MP’s bar in the Houses of Parliament – what really goes on during those long long debates..

No, Gordon said to wait until we're called.

Silly Party HQ

Caption Comp shares a Stealers Wheel moment.

The Council got me a job in Piccadilly Circus, but I must have got the wrong end of the stick

Well, nobody told me it was a ‘wake’ either..

You know what they say about men with big feet?
Yeah, bunions.

Welcome to Hell. Take a number and we'll be right with you.

OK, now guess what I came as, go on..

Two understudies wait to hear if Ronald's anxiety attack at a McDonald's birthday party is serious

"I know they match your outfit, George, but if you had just listened and bought a pair in your size, you wouldn't need to scrunch up your feet."

But the worse part was when she said, she'd rather live next to Madonna.

Yeah, it's the last time I walk through the make-up department at Debenham's too

Yes, and Guy Laliberte has been over the moon ever since.

Two previous Caption Competition winners also found they had something in common whilst waiting for their small quantity of kudos to be presented.

Now I have to get my CRB, maybe "The Great Peedo" wasn't such a good name

Horrorscopes #3: Gemini

Oh, and Mum wants her tea-cosy back

I'm fresh out of balloons, and that bloke over there was moaning it looked more like a poodle than a lion.

I gotta go the Doctor - I feel a bit funny

Because sometimes you just have to follow your impulses.

I've got to hand it to you Osama, that's a damn fine disguise. Not bad yourself Elvis.

Ant and Dec enjoy some down time

Me Mam said to get a new suit for the court hearing, but maybe I should have gone to Dunn's instead of Billy Smart's

So there I was waiting in the queue, and Her Majesty finally gets to me, and the first thing she says is "And what do you do?"

Do you think they've stopped looking for us yet Butch? Dunno Sundance, just dunno.

And then she said, sob, she was leaving me for my chiropodist..

"Are you alright? You look a bit drawn..."

Then the wife says 'If I catch you in my make up cabinet again we're through!'

So this magazine article said the best way to get a girl is to laugh her into bed, but it doesn't seem to be working

So the circus threw me out - they said I was making a laughing-stock of them

I really wanted to be an accountant, but my dad insisted I got a proper job.

I thought I was being asked to join The Chippendales, not Chipperfield's

"No, no, no. Nietzsche aims at freeing higher human beings from their false consciousness about morality and their false belief that morality is good for them, not at a transformation of society at large."

I got a job advertising Oxo - they want me to promote their new "Laughing Stock"

Question Time, the Green Room, and the BNP representatives are having second thoughts...

Do I look fat in this?

"Look on the bright side Flavio, it's only until your appeal and Jenson did win after all........"

And I suppose you're the Clown Prince there too?

"You're in my seat."

"What've you come as?"

The room gradually filled up before the traders decided that days prices for derivatives..

Terrible two's? Nah, aged three, they're the ones you've got to watch out for.

Labour's economic advisor's nerves are evident as they patiently wait outside the conference hall for the reaction to Alistair Darling's speech.

I think Coco could have made more of an effort

As another pitch leaves the Den empty handed, Coco and Parp decide they will target Peter Jones...

In a show of confidence verging on arrogance, Bob was relying solely on his famous balloon-dog to see him through to the finals.

I've got a flask in my pocket if it gets too depressing.

Trinny and Susannah wait patiently in the Jonathan Ross green room

Send in the CLONES!

The Tomaszewski twins waited anxiously outside Mr Clough's office to see if their job applications had been successful

Tha Labour party had an idea this would boost their flagging popularity.

By the tenth series of 'Strictly' we thought we'd seen it all.....

If only I'd read the part of Hamlet a little more closely for the audition

The Prime Ministers Televised Debate was looking good for Gordon Brown as Clegg and Cameron fell for his "lets do it in fancy dress" request.

I hear ±«Óãtvy is the keynote speaker this year.

The Cheeky Girls, where are they now?

Gordon Brown and John Prescott join the media circus

It was the least I could do for my mother-in-law's funeral

"Look mate, its only for 24hrs,just to make our wages up.We`ll be back in the sorting office tomorrow."

Fancy seeing you here, you're having a laugh if you've come for a mortgage

So then I said "Bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia!"

Are you sure we're doing the right thing in becoming Freemasons?

Mis-typed invitation leads to confusion at 'Human cloning' conference.

Well, I've got tickets to Frida Kahlo, so you'd better be nice to me.

The 3 finalists in the 40th annual Monty Python silly walks competition practice their routines.

So the Police guessed straight away who'd put the banana skin outside my wife's bedroom door

"Strewth! Who'd wear a tie like that!"

I haven't been able to buy a decent car since British Leyland finished

You know, I used to do those ads for Iceland.

Zuzzy and Zwyzzy always wondered why they were the last contestants at the conventions.

System designers prepare to go on stage at the launch of Windows 7.