±«Óãtv

How come we missed out being in last week's caption competition?

He gets grumpy if you mention his being a little short - he's an eye-level gorilla

any monkey business going on?

Sun readers are confused about the editorial direction their paper is taking.

how's the banana exchange rate this morning?

Well the graph of my share portfolio looks a lot better if I hold the paper this way up.

You know lots of entrants dress up? Well, I thought I might get a human costume for this year's Great Gorilla Run.

my paper is printed upside down, is yours ok?

With the price of rubber as it is, that old tyre I swing from must be worth a fortune

once again they forgot the K, it should be monkey news and not money news!

The Australian Dollar's doing badly

You're supporting the Dian Fossey Fund too?

Cadbury's shares are taking a beating

Do you like the smoking jacket? I got it off a baboon at the safari park.

Actually yes, Sigourney Weaver was great fun to work with

The guy in the yellow specs - he says we have to let him win - he knows where we live.

My wife says I look like Noel Coward in this dressing-gown

Page 3 is supposed to have a pretty hot orangutan this week. I just love redheads.

Disgusted that their paper is now supporting the Conservatives, a couple of 'Sun' readers decide to try another paper!

O2? Nah, I'm with Orange-Utan.

King Kong found sulking after "bigger boys" stole his Financial Times. When asked what was wrong he replied "No FT (anymore), No Comment"...

Bet you a monkey Cadburys shares are down by close of business.

I see bank shares are up today

Monkeys sat infront of a keyboard type the letter S more than any other? It's only to be s'pected!

Any personals asking for swingers this week?

Well I'll be a monkeys uncle....

So, despite your learning to write in English, Mjikuu still hasn't replied to your letters then?

A couple of The City's highest bonus earners check out the latest share tips...

After analysing the evidence, it was decided the Gorilla Trading Tactics were not a significant threat

I'm afraid it's gone down to $13.92 an ounce. Oh, sorry - I thought you said you were a silver backer.

It's good to see silver-back on the commodity markets again.

Urbane gorillas?

Oh yes, I'm a fan of his on Facebook.

I see shares in Gorilla Outfit Hire Shops are doing really well

Gorillas get the gist

Will you be strap hanging on the tube again tonight?

So she slaps my face, calls me a knuckle dragging neanderthal and throws me out of the cave. I think it's the real thing this time.

We've always been optimists, but nowadays we have to read the FT upside down to make the graphs look half reasonable.

Peter Jackson's taking a devil of a long time with these auditions

Investigators find the root of the sub-primate lending scandal

It's been 3 years Gus, do you really think Mjikuu is still pining over you? You've really got to get back in the dating game. You want someone smart, who's going places, not stranded out in the jungle. Here, check the personals in the FT...

The escape from London Zoo was going well until someone said 'Have a good trip'.

The last time I wore this outfit was the night before my wedding, and my mates welded the zip

Shares in Blue Chimp companies seem to be doing well!

George Bush's clever disguise didn't have everyone fooled.

Got a light?

The Empire State Building? With my vertigo? I couldn't even get on the fourth plinth.

I tried it, but blond hair doesn't work for me - people kept on thinking I was the Mayor

I say, I'm in the mood for a good grooming. What time do you have to be back in the office?

Auditions for 'Jungle Book, the Stage Musical' were slow going.

Says here, "the times are out of joint".

An oldy...

What's long, pink and hard in the mornings?

The Financial Times crossword

These newspapers taste fine - just as soon as you get rid of the fish-and-chips in them

Nah, Sudoku makes no sense this way up either.

Is that Charlton Heston?

I daren't actually light the pipe - then everybody complains about gorillas in the mist

51 correction: "is out of joint".

How are your shares in Fyffes?

What! Another typo?

I've got to get used to reading it this way. Got a date with that prehensile temptress from finance.

You'll keep buying the wrong paper until you remember there's a K in it...

Being the accountants for the troop had really gone to their heads.

My mate over there is from India - he's a turban gorilla

Nostalgia for the primates rules. Uk?!

I hear we're only getting half the termites in this quarter's bonus packet.

64 correction: "Ok?!"

If I get made redundant, I'm thinking about taking up the drums.

Keep walking and look casual and they'll never guess we work for the Financial Services Authority.

"Did you bet on the Footsie to keep falling?"

Too right it's a jungle out there.

FTSE? Nah, I never did understand the offside rule.

Well mum said when the cameras were off she had a bit of a thing for David Attenborough

"...I mean take me for example. I'm the king of the swingers, AND the jungle VIP. But I've hit the top mate, had to stop. See, glass celing."

Ponzi scheme?! I thought it smelled of frangipani in there.

The keepers at my zoo had to take an aptitude test, and so, for a laugh, they invited us in too ... well, I didn't want a job as a keeper, did I?

"It says here that Simian Bank executives have got a THREE million banana bonus each, Gerald. We've been short changed with only a measly two..."

Well blow me down David; it says here I passed that Banking Exam

Things are getting a bit hairy on the Circle Line platform, boss.

"You know, you're right Gerald. Looking at these graphs upside down DOES make one more optimistic about the jolly old economy!"

Wonder if Starbuck's has got the banana smoothie on special today.

"Photographer discovers startling new evidence of tool use among the higher primates.........." Good Gods, Geoff - we've been sussed!

Forgot to get dressed this morning but I think I've got away with it.

Oh! Bananarama are getting appealing.

It's not as much fun as clambering over the cars in Knowsley Safari Park, is it?

Costa Rican and Guatemalan are alright, but those organic ones from Ecuador have just been fabulous lately.

I'm looking for somewhere central, near to the City, two bedrooms, en suite, double garage, and a hook on the ceiling for my tyre

I say, not only can those gorillas read, but they can read upside-down too!

Any news on our bonuses?

That train's late again! I just hope it's full, so we can hang from the straps.

What recession? You seen this graph? It's done nothing but climb!!

Same old Headlines "Too Much Monkey Business"

The next financial instrument for the City? 'Primitives'!

So we can be successful if we change our names to Alexander and paint our houses blue.

See the PM's made a bit of a Chimp of himself again!

Elton John's writing another musical? You've got to be dead before he writes a song about one of us.

Gorrilas in the Midst.

Desperately unlucky in love, both Godfrey and Luke were nervously killing time before gatecrashing a Wookie Speed Dating event.

I hear Sarah Palin's memoir's due out in November

It's ok I've only spent a monkey on them

Mmm, I think we can afford to open the kimono a little on this one - oh, I see you already have