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Paper Monitor

13:09 UK time, Tuesday, 16 June 2009

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

The Sun's Page 3 girl today is Lisa, 530, from Florence.

She doesn't, sadly, give her verdict on whether the ±«Óãtv licence fee should be shared with commercial broadcasters, or in fact any other issue of the day. She's not so active (or "bubbly", as the jargon in these parts of the papers usually has it) as she once was, being Lisa as in Mona Lisa.

The paper explains its introduction of oil painting nudes thus: "The saucy portrait gives us a glimpse of what she's got to smile about as it goes on show after laying hidden for hundreds of years." Was that an audible leer?

The renaissance stunner even gets a bit of a plug on the paper's front page, though how many purchasers will be swayed by the prospect of a nude from 1500 is debatable.

It does, incidentally, offer a DVD giveaway, which makes Paper Monitor feel almost retro. That's a green shoot of recovery, surely? Any other ideas for novel measurements of economic recovery via the COMMENTS button please.

Ahh those good times... when you used to be able to get an entire DVD library from what fell out of the day's papers... how far away they seem. But there are still freebies to be had if you're prepared to be selective about what you want and what paper you're prepared to read.

Today's Daily Mirror will give you a free £2 bet at William Hill while the Daily Star does the same thing for Coral. Once upon a time such a thing would have been frowned upon for encouraging people to start betting, but times have changed.

There's another offer in the Star - a cheap copy of the Daily Express which in its way feels a bit like the bookie offer. It's almost like saying "here try this, it's really good stuff you know". The Daily Star as a gateway drug to the hard stuff of the Express. Who'd have thought it?

But what they find when they get there, assuming any Star readers make that journey, may well befuddle them a bit... Today free in the Express.... a giveaway pack of Waitrose long grain rice.

Paper Monitor's brain hurts.

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