Black Holes: Did Brian Cox just break Matt Lucas's brain?
As you are about to discover, black holes are a very, very complicated subject. So complicated that physicists have to break physics to allow them to make sense. And physicists hate breaking physics.
Cosmologist Sean Carroll and astrophysicist Janna Levin joined Infinite Monkey Cage hosts Brian Cox and Robin Ince to try and explain the ins and outs of black holes to comedian and self-proclaimed buffoon Matt Lucas. Results, it’s fair to say, were mixed.
Baffling Black Holes
What is a Black Hole?
The basics
A black hole is a region in space where gravity has become so intense that nothing can escape from it.
I’ve been on the black hole. It was at Richmond Water Slides. It’s quite perilous.Matt Lucas
Cosmologist Sean Carroll says...
“Einstein’s idea was that spacetime, where we live, is curved. It can bend in on itself. And that bending is what we experience as gravity.
Then there’s Einstein’s idea that nobody can travel faster than the speed of light. Combined, you get the possibility of there being a region of spacetime where gravity is so strong that literally nothing can escape. Because in order to escape, you would have to travel faster than the speed of light. And that’s what a black hole is.”
Matt Lucas says...
“I’m good with it. I’ve been on the black hole. It was at Richmond Water Slides. I’ve been through it. There’s a bit where it’s quite dark and a bit where there’s lights. It’s quite perilous.”
Quantum Gravity
The basics
Trying to explain the make-up and properties of a black hole requires the meshing of two branches of physics theory: Einstein’s theory of relativity and quantum mechanics.
This, for me, is like simulated dementia.Matt Lucas
Cosmologist Sean Carroll says...
“There’s not only general relativity but there’s also this other big theory of physics: quantum mechanics. Sadly they don’t play nicely together yet. We don’t have a final theory of “quantum gravity”. We know black holes are there, we know they’re basically what Einstein said they should be. But not much more than that.”
Matt Lucas says...
"I honestly feel like I’ve wandered into the wrong room. This, for me, is like simulated dementia.”
The Event Horizon
The basics
As you cross the boundary between a black hole and the rest of space, you pass over the event horizon, the area around a black hole beyond which no light or other radiation can escape.
Do they have wi-fi there?Matt Lucas
In the podcast, Matt Lucas is offered the chance of theoretically crossing the event horizon of a black hole with astrophysicist Janna Levin…
Astrophysicist Janna Levin says...
“Our experience should be of weightlessness and we could be joking and having a perfectly good time. And then we would have the unhappy realisation that we were inside the black hole. We would never be able to get out of it. At least not in our current form.”
Matt Lucas says...
“Do they have wi-fi there? As long as I can Instagram from there I’m quite happy.”
Singularity
The basics
Inside a black hole is a point of gravitational singularity, where density and gravity become infinite and spacetime curves infinitely. Beyond this, the laws of physics break down.
I’m still open to it but is it all right if you go through my agent?Matt Lucas
Matt and Janna, still inside their black hole, are approaching the singularity…
Astrophysicist Janna Levin says...
“There is this inevitability that we would be crushed to death by the spacetime, our bits would be torn apart, we’d be brought down to our fundamental particles and then we don’t really know what happens!”
Matt Lucas says...
“I’m still open to it but is it all right if you go through my agent? It’s much harder for me to say ‘no’ to things. It’s much easier for my agent to say ‘no thanks’.”
Black Hole Complementarity
The basics
To try and rectify the discrepancies between Einstein’s theories and quantum mechanics, black hole complementarity proposes that various seemingly impossible things can occur at once, if they complement each other and don’t contradict each other. So Matt could be inside the black hole and outside at the same time.
Cosmologist Sean Carroll says...
“We ordinarily think of space and time as where we’re located. That’s the stage on which all of physics plays out. But now it seems the underlying reality doesn’t put space and time in a central location. It just emerges out of something deeper that we’re still trying to figure out.”
Brian Cox says…
“How do you feel, Matt, that you could be delocalised? The idea that there can be parts of you inside this black hole connected by a worm hole to parts of you billions of light years away?”
Matt Lucas says...
“To me that just depends on what form that takes. I hope I don’t come across as vulgar here but if my penis is inside the black hole but my testicles are outside of it I don’t think I would be very happy. So I don’t have a good feeling about that.”
The Holographic Principle
The basics
To tackle some of their black hole quandaries, quantum physicists began to think of black holes as two-dimensional.
Since lockdown I am not two-dimensional. I have eaten so much!Matt Lucas
Astrophysicist Janna Levin says...
“Maybe this idea that a black hole is a three-dimensional object is as much an illusion as a hologram is an illusion that it’s three dimensions. Really, the black hole is the two-dimensional surface. Just like a hologram is the two-dimensional surface. So then you start to question the entire universe. Maybe it’s an illusion that we live in three dimensions. Maybe the whole universe is a hologram. Maybe we’re really a two-dimensional projection.”
Matt Lucas says...
“I hear you, but since lockdown I am not two-dimensional. I have eaten so much!”
In conclusion...
I have genuinely learnt some things and I apologise for being such a buffoon, but it was the only way I could contribute.Matt Lucas
