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Episode 1 – A pirate captain worries about early bedtime, a soldier from the First World War struggles to cook with fake food and the four King Georges form a boyband.

Episode 2 – A stone-age doctor tries to help a modern patient, a whining Pharaoh invents the pyramid, and Henry VIII meets his dead friends.

Episode 3 – A Roman emperor finds a nasty alternative to candles, an Egyptian tries to save money on mummification, and the Roundheads and Cavaliers take part in Historical Wife Swap.

Episode 4 – The Tudors sing their family history, Bob explains the complete history of Rome in two minutes, and a mad Victorian gentleman eats King Louis XIV's mummified heart.

Episode 5 – A priest makes a piano from live pigs, Emperor Caligula declares war on the sea, and we discover disgusting beauty tips from Ancient Egypt.

Episode 6 – An evil Greek god appears on a daytime chat show, a rich Georgian swaps his wife with a peasant, and we meet some weird medieval monsters.

Episode 7 – The Houses of Parliament smell of poo, Cinderella struggles with the Blitz, and Helen of Troy reveals her complicated love life.

Episode 8 – The Saxons exchange disgusting Christmas presents, a caveman goes on a TV cookery show and we discover the bizarre causes of the First World War.

Episode 9 – A Victorian inspector checks that school is suitably cruel, HHTV News reports live from the Great Plague and Thumbelina drowns in poo.

Episode 10 – HHTV News reports live from the Battle of Thermopylae, Celt housewives find decorative uses for severed heads and we learn the revolting truth about Roman toilets.

Episode 11 – Queen Victoria learns her British comforts aren't very British, a Viking warrior won't stop talking in rhyme, and the contestants try to become executioners on Axe Factor.

Episode 12 – A Victorian teacher is confused by her pupils' bizarre names, the Romans run out of animals to execute, and Queen Victoria advertises her exercise DVD.

Episode 13 – A lazy aristocrat invents the sandwich, the Romans host their own revolting cookery show, and William Shakespeare is haunted by the ghost of King Richard III.