Help, my lungs are burning!
- 4 Jul 06, 01:13 AM
ESSEN - Four laps of a running track. Easy right?
If only I could say that was true but after running a mile for on Monday evening I felt the cool touch of the grim reaper on my shoulder and the hot burning sensation of the devil in my lungs.
I mean, I'm 33 now so no longer in the first thrusts of youth but I'm hardly over the hill and if I was a Premiership footballer who had looked after myself and avoided serious injury I might be in line for one last pay day.
But I'm not a Premiership footballer, I have suffered serious injury - two broken knee caps, one broken collarbone, one chipped elbow, two broken fingers and ligament damage in each ankle - and my diet and lifestyle are the sort that ensure I won't outstay my welcome on the planet called earth.
In this context, my time of 6.31 must surely be acceptable? I have actually no idea since the last time I ran a mile I was being pursued by a pack of hooligans through the streets of Brussels and may well have set a new world record.
To put you in the picture, we were told by people lazing behind their desks in the office back in London (harsh Fletch, very harsh - you're lucky we're not .. Ed) that we really should run a mile while out here in Germany for Sport Relief.
We asked for suggestions as to where and Penny - comment eight - came up with the idea of an army barracks near Monchengladbach - a venue at which her dad raced while in the army.
The Joint Headquarters base at seemed to be the location and Jinny Carling of arranged for us to undertake the run in the early evening.
It was Jinny's day off - so many thanks if you are reading this for going out of your way to make it possible.
Ricco and I were somewhat dismayed when we turned up and realised that the blazing sun had lost none of its potency - and I was less than thrilled to lose the toss and told I would be first to go.
Halfway through the first lap - that's all of 200 metres - the knee started playing up. For motivation I tried to visualise how embarrassing it would look on the video Ricco is cutting if I pulled up but any such worries were soon superceded by the pain in my lungs.
Gasping for breath I pushed on and on and on, eventually dribbling over the finish line with all thoughts of a sprint finish Coe style having long since been abandoned.
Ricco, video camera in his hand, undertook the flash interview that I had suggested.
Question after question followed with no hint of an answer from yours truly. The only words I could have mustered would have been of the unpublishable variety.
Next up was Ricco, resplendent in his running shoes. Around and around he went but without any real sign of pain. I was still hurting.
Lap times, however, revealed he was slower and his finish time of 7.27 confirmed this. In his favour, he did not look nearly as bad as I felt I must surely have done.
I could go and on about how he is seven years younger than me, sometimes goes to the gym, plays five-a-side every week etc etc - but I suppose the point is that the Sport Relief mile is not so much about times but actually bothering to do it.
And there are two individuals in London - by the names of Alex Trickett and Sean Chaney - who have pushed and prodded us into this.
I would love nothing more than to see them run a mile under a scorching sun, stripped of dignity, pride and breath.
It might be a short distance to anyone half fit, but it really hurt and I want to see them practise what they have most definitely preached.
Don't forget to for the chance to win some
fabulous Sport Relief prizes, including a Pele-signed table football and
our very own Shevchenko-signed Fletch and Ricco t-shirts.
Comments Post your comment
I am eager to see the video and I feel pity for you two. It is really terrible that after England lost the game World Cup has lost its attractions for the English fans. So, if my idea of arranging
took place English fans would
have been something to look for. Today, before or after the semifinal match, if
England played Argentina or Brazil or Ukraine then many English fans would feel
excited. Since this is not going to take place, enjoy your stay and running a
mile.
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Looking at todays articles surrounding beckhams departure as captain i think my lungs are burning now too. I agree it is the right time for him to hand the band to someone else, and would even agree that he may not have been the best guy for the job. But calls for beckham not being in the first 11 maybe somewhat rash. Lets remember who scored or was involved in near enough all of the england goals in this world cup and prior to it. Beckham has saved our country with inspirational free kicks and crosses. Surely the guy is still one of the best 23 players we have? if not one of the best 11 still? Del piero for italy still commands a place in Italys squad after all these years and finds himself in a world cup semi final. England need to stop being so fickle and support the team rather than piling on the pressure which may contribute to our failings at penalty shoot-outs!
Good luck to the next generation of players but why not mix the youth with experience?
James
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Congrats to both of you for running the mile! I am looking forward to seeing the video.
Meanwhile, you seem to be in my hometown, Essen. Hope you enjoy yourselves. If you have time, check out Zeche and Kokerei Zollverein, as I have suggested in an earlier post. Lake Baldeney is perfect for cycling and roller-skating and walking. The city centre has many shops, but for the odd beer in the evening I'd recommend , with its many bars and restaurants.
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Isn't it amazing what a little travelling and experiencing of a country can do to peoples mentality. It is so good to see see so many England supporters changing their opinion of German nations, their great people and their beautiful country. For too long people have been believing the absolute nonsense that is written in our gutter press.
For too long we have been obsessed with World War Two and stuck in a time warp. Perhaps the experiences of this World Cup will change peoples opinions of our natural cultural and social European ally for good, and at last destroy the 'little Englander' mantality.
My only regret from this is that when visiting Germany in the future it is going to be full of British people since many will opt to go there rather than the Med! The peaceful, cultural holiday may be shattered. But, that can only be a good thing.
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Good work Fletch!
I was with my mate, you and your fellow TeamTalk roving reporter when we were chased through the streets at Euro 2000 and had to barricade ourselves in a bar.
I ended up in A&E after being whacked round he head despite having never run so fast in my life.
Still have the ripped, blood-stained England shirt as a momento!
Them were the days...!
Hope you're having a more trouble-free trip this time!
Enjoying the blog!
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Rüttenscheid rules! :-)
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Excellant run by you both dont think you will make the olympics but think you deserve some sponsor money for your vallant effort its in the post and on its way to you.
We are still gutted about our exit from Germany but have to pick ourselves up and lets hope our new manager can get us motivated to move on and upwards to the next Euro championships.
Well done to all our fans over there they have been absolutly fabulous. If the World Cup had been won on fan support we would have won hands down.
I have now to say good luck to Germany tonight and to France tomorrow.
Finally thank you David Beckham for giving 6yrs of service as our captain.
Fletch and Ricco thanks for making this blog site one of the best if not the best enjoy the rest of the week.
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I'm not even irish
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Jez,
Great to hear from you. As you well know everything got a bit confusing that night and I always wondered what happened to you.
I bumped into your mate very briefly a couple of weeks later and he said it had not gone well, but I had no real idea as to what happened.
That was a real nasty evening when truly innocent people - like your good self - got caught up in stuff. I can happily report that it has not been like that this time. Very much happy days so far.
Hope all is well and take care.
p.s look after that shirt.
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Well done lads, my dad will be so pleased!
Enjoy the rest of the tournament - the blog has been very entertaining!
Thanks
Penny
x
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Well done lads. Just watched the video and it was a trip down memory lane. We lived in Rheindahlen and our footy team (St Georges primary) played Borussia Moenchengladbach's kids team on the pitch you were running round in 1980/1. I think they beat us 2-1.
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Fletch - if it's any consolation, I cycled a mile or so to work this evening and had both the devil and the grim reaper eating my dust.
But I take your point. Perhaps Sean should run a mile.
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Oh - and can you ask your pal Ricco to do it again - we did say "run" not walk.
I'll make myself scarce when you both return then. . .
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You've won my respect! I wouldn't stand a chance of doing it, but then I'm 40 next week & rapidly falling apart at the seams!
Well done to you guys, you've made reading about the WC a great pleasure for an Englishman in Texas!
Just don't try running home. Stick with Svan!
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Great page chaps, nice to meet you on Monday, and hope the body doubles have recovered...making them run in that heat was a bit off!
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