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It's often a balancing act, being a parent - worrying about where your child is academically and worrying about where they should be, but also recognising that children need to relax away from the pressure of school life and reconnect with their family and friends.

So, how can we help our children to play and learn ‘by stealth’ this summer without taking the fun out of the holidays?

Dr Anisa-Ree Moses is from Learning & Wellbeing Psychology, which provides educational psychology services. These are her top tips…

Dr Moses says: “There’s a lot that happens in play that’s important for general life skills, as well as academic life skills. There’s social and emotional development, with things like being able to negotiate and compromise.

“Play is so big in terms of how children begin to understand the world around them and how they understand themselves in the world.It’s how they begin to understand how things work, how people interact with each other, sharing, taking turns, trial and error, giving up and persevering.” So, there's no need for guilt this summer if your child is enjoying playing with their toys, friends or siblings.

Dr Moses suggests incorporating ‘playful learning’ into your child's days this summer.

Speak to your child’s teacher to find out what skills they might need to build on. If, for example, your child needs to practise the letter ‘s’, you could do a scavenger hunt around the house looking for things beginning with that letter. For older children, you could expand that to be about particular vocabulary or categories of things. Your child could also practise their writing skills by writing on the pavement or park path with washable chalk.

Dr Moses says: “If you’re going to do any overt learning – like sitting down to read or write – keep it short and sweet. Think of different ways to engage them, like creating a quiz where each child has a buzzer with a funny noise. Or let them do something they enjoy - like maths games or reading on the computer. And make sure you do something fun afterwards, like dancing around.

“You can also ask them to explain things for you. If you’re writing a shopping list, say ‘I’m not sure how many tins of beans are in the cupboard, could you count them? Do we need more baked beans?‘ Get them involved in problem solving and decision making – it’s stealth learning!”

Children learn from conversations with their siblings, peers and parents.

You could test their vocabulary skills for fun, by banning a couple of words for the next 30 minutes and challenging them to find other words that mean the same thing. Dr Moses says: “It’s helping them think of how they can describe it. They’re finding different ways to get their point across.”

Joining a child in their play can give caregivers a glimpse into how their child sees their world.

Another way to talk with your child is through 'commentary' - “An adult comes alongside whatever that child is doing, allowing the child to lead the play whilst offering information." This could be you saying something like 'I see you've built that castle all by yourself, following the instructions in the booklet' or 'I can see you've really planned how everyone will navigate that assault course'.

It’s a good way of offering vocabulary and helping quieter children, or those who may be struggling with their speech, without interrupting the flow of play.

Free play is essentially ‘non-directed’ or child-led play. We allow our children to play whatever peaks their interest, without setting up a specific activity or giving them instructions.

Dr Moses says: “If play only takes place within adult parameters, rules and expectations, it can stifle their creativity and self-discovery … Allowing a child to get a bit bored and not entertained all the time will enable them to think about what they can do and peak their natural curiosity.

“[Free play] also allows them to develop their decision-making skills, self-advocacy skills, sharing, resilience and perseverance, and to follow and develop their interests.”

So, let your child choose what they want to play and for how long. If your child struggles with this type of play you can, of course, provide props to encourage them – like building bricks, paper, craft items, dolls and teddies.

This Parents' Toolkit article about the importance of boredom in helping children get creative shares helpful tips for parents.

Primary school children still have a lot of gross motor skills to build on – like being able to coordinate themselves whilst throwing and catching a ball, running and playing chase or riding a bike. This summer is the perfect opportunity for them to develop those skills, and with it a sense of independence.

Dr Moses also says don't forget about things like den building (inside or out), hopscotch and poohsticks! Or, she suggests, maybe tying colourful wool or string between the cupboards in your kitchen. Tell the children they are lasers and they have to navigate through it without touching them. These games support gross motor and problem-solving skills whilst having fun!

If your kids aren't keen on getting outdoors or the weather isn't good, this article has more ideas for getting them moving and learning at home.

For activities that help develop motor skills - this article has fun games to help children with SEND get active at home.

Or explore our 'Activities' section for more activities for the family.

Finally, Dr Moses says young children need to learn about kindness and recognising others’ needs. Playing out over summer will help them gain and build those social skills around compromise and how you resolve conflict. She says it’s also a reflection point for us as adults – how do we deal with situations like that?

So, encourage your child to play, let them enjoy socialising and playing either outdoors or indoors - they'll still be learning, but having lots of fun as they do so.

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