Expecting not all you expected? Is it less âglowingâ and more âgruellingâ?
When youâre dealing with the emotional rollercoaster of being pregnant, itâs not unusual to feel like everythingâs getting on top of you.
Youâre dealing with lots of physical symptoms, changes in your life, uncertainties and worries about your baby, as well as handling everything going on at home.
It should bring you some comfort that youâre not alone â feeling anxious during pregnancy is very common â and that there are plenty of ways you can help your mental wellbeing.
Tell someone how youâre feeling
As simple as it sounds, donât bottle up your feelings.
It doesnât matter who you open up to â online or face-to-face, your partner or a friend â but when you do, it will feel like a weightâs lifted.
A problem shared really is a problem halved. And you will be taking the first step to feeling better.
Find a good time and place to talk to someone â ideally when you canât be distracted.
Find any root causes
Stress is a complex condition at any time, but especially so with the added highs and lows of pregnancy hormones.
This means you wonât always be able to unpick the causes and sort them. But if you can identify any reasons youâre feeling the way you are â some people find it helpful to write them down â you might be able to deal with them and stop them spiralling.
⊠and ask for practical help
Think about whether someone elseâs support could help you tackle your stresses head-on.
For example, do you have a health concern that your GP or midwife can answer, money worries or a job at home that a friend could help with?
Dealing with small niggling issues can help you feel more in control.
Get plenty of rest
Easier said than done, especially when youâre dealing with leg cramps and heartburn â but renewing your batteries with quality sleep can help you feel calmer.
If youâre having trouble nodding off, give your sleep habits a health check: for example, avoid eating too late, turn off devices like phones, TVs or tablets way before your bedtime and keep your bedroom cool.
And if you tend to wake up worrying about things you need to do, keep a notepad by your bed â sometimes the physical act of writing your tasks down can help.
Donât take on too much
Do you really need to repaint that room? Will your friend really mind if you donât go for the whole of her hen party?
Now is the time to focus on you and bonding with your bump so donât feel guilty about shelving things that just arenât important.
Stop comparing yourself
Your social media channels might be full of super-positive, stardust-sprinkled posts about the joy of pregnancy, but feeling anxious isnât unusual.
Donât get sucked into thinking everyone else is having a wonderful time â theyâre not. And your energy is best focused on how youâre feeling and the things that you can control.
Eat well
When your body isnât getting enough good fuel, it will let you know.
Energy dips can leave you feeling extra cranky, so graze on healthy snacks like fruit, nuts and seeds and go for foods that provide slow-release energy, like oats, brown rice and wholemeal bread.
For advice on eating well, speak to your midwife and check out our healthy eating guide.
Make time to exercise
Gentle exercise is one thing you shouldnât side-line during pregnancy. Itâs a mood-lifter and will help you feel physically stronger during pregnancy too. Afterwards, focus on how much better you feel for getting out.
Even a regular walk in a park has plenty of benefits and isnât too daunting, especially if you can get a partner to join you.
Walking not for you? For other pregnancy-friendly exercise ideas and safety advice, visit the .
Meet up with other mums-to-be
Spending time with people who understand how youâre feeling is a guaranteed pick-me-up. But if youâre not feeling all that sparky, it can be the last thing you feel like doing. So set yourself a small target like meeting up for short bursts.
Getting expert help
If you feel anxious most of the time and youâre starting to worry about how youâll cope once your baby arrives, donât be afraid to speak to your midwife or GP. They will have suggestions to help you feel better. For added support, you can also ask your midwife for a referral to a specialist mental health midwife.
Remember that you are not wasting anyoneâs time by asking for help â how you are feeling is important.
Article produced with help from Pamela Mills, an NHS midwife based in Greater Manchester.