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‘I used a hairdryer to warm my daughter’s feet’

Nikki Fox meets the families making difficult energy decisions.

In the very first episode of Access All, Nikki Fox meets the families with disabled children who rely on specialist medical equipment and are facing very difficult decisions as energy bills in the UK soar.

Dan’s taken to lifting his 12-year-old daughter, Emily, from sofa to wheelchair rather than use her power-guzzling hoist. It might save money, but it’s damaging his back. Single-mum, Adele, wants to take her terminally ill daughter, Molly, out on day trips but with lifts and suction machines needing to be charged, it’s become impossible to pay for these outings.

Nikki and Emma Tracey explore exclusive figures obtained for the podcast from the charity Contact, which surveyed 5,500 families about the impact of increasing energy costs. Almost 2,000 families said they feared their child's condition would get worse as a result of rising prices.

Ever wanted to join a gym, but found the biggest barrier is walking through the door? Emma has the lowdown on how to begin your gym-journey while revealing her own blindie anxieties.

And baking legend, Briony May Williams chats cake, limb difference, learning to love the ‘d’ word and why she’s so excited about her brand new comedy show.

This week’s Access All was made by Beth Rose and Keiligh Baker. The cost of living producer was Alice Cuddy. The technical producer was Dave O’Neill.

The editors were Damon Rose and Jonathan Aspinwall.

Release date:

Available now

35 minutes

Transcript

28th April 2022

bbc.co.uk/ouch/podcast

Access All Pilot – Episode 1

Presented by Emma Tracey and Nikki Fox


Nikki- Can you hear me all right, Em? Thanks, Livs.

Emma- Hi, Nikki, yeah I can. Are you okay?

Nikki- You can hear me!

Emma- I can. Can you hear me?

Nikki- Do you want to go in there with the guys? That was lovely Livy, my PA, she’s getting my headset on for me because it’s the size of a house.

Emma- Yeah, I’ve got Karen in the corner but maybe I should send her out as well.

Nikki- Oh, I love it. Off she goes. There she is. I tell you what, Em?

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Nikki- I’m really nervous.

Emma- Don’t be nervous. It’s all a chat.

Nikki- I know.

Emma- I’m supposed to know all about gyms.

Nikki- I know nothing about fitness. I mean, I move my arms a little bit and I adjust my hair and I put a lot of mascara on, like a two year old.

Emma- I think it’s about doing what is within one’s means and stuff.

Nikki- I tell you what, Ems, if you had told a young little disabled Foxy that she’d be fronting a podcast she’d have fallen over. Which she did a lot anyway, but she would’ve. 

I’ve got little hearts on my nails. I did my nails because I’ve fallen in love recently

Emma- Oh I know; it’s so cute.

Nikki- Quite disgusting. I spent 20 years dead inside.

Emma- It’s very exciting then.

Nikki- And then I found a gardener.

Emma- Oh is he a gardener? A sexy gardener?

Nikki- Yeah he’s a gardener. Right, shall we get on with this, Emma? Shall we do it?

Emma- Let’s do it.

Nikki- Let’s get on with our new pod. This is Access All from the ±«Óãtv.

music- Theme music.

Nikki- I’m Nikki Fox, Access All host. And we are in our swanky new studio in Broadcasting House in London, and it’s all very exciting.

Emma- And I’m Emma Tracey. I’m the Access All reporter. And I’m about 400 miles north of Nikki in our Edinburgh studio.

Nikki- But I can see your lovely face.

Emma- Well, I can’t see yours but that’s okay, because I’m blind so it works.

Nikki- This is a new podcast. It’s about disability, but it’s also about mental health issues. We’re going to be here every Friday. And in this episode our guest is Bake Off star, now ±«Óãtv presenter, Briony May Williams. 

But first we are going to talk about a very important issue, the cost of living.

Audio Clip- “Alright sweetheart, let’s get you in the lift now. Ready, one, two, three. Ooh watch your tootsies, mummy shut the door. OK, I’m going to send you downstairs.

Nikki- Families with disabled children fear that the record rise in energy prices could make their child’s condition worse, and that’s according to a survey by a leading disability charity which was shared exclusively with this podcast. Now, Emma you’ve got some more details on this, haven’t you?

Emma- Yes, I do. So, 5,500 people responded to this self-selecting survey that Contact did. And Contact is a charity that looks after disabled families in the UK.

Two thousand, almost two thousand of those families said that they feared that their child’s condition was going to get worse because of the rise in energy prices.

I think we know that a lot of families with disabled kids use more energy. And they discovered that families with disabled kids have bills that are £600 higher than the average household’s energy bill. And that’s Ofgem gave them the figure, the regulator, of what the average household energy bill is. So, we’re know that they’re paying more. Then we also know that families with disabled kids have  a lot going on. It’s not always possible for both people to work. It’s often a single-parent family. People are dealing with one salary or relying fully on benefits to get by. So, there’s a lot going on there and there’s a lot of worries around energy within the disability community.

Nikki- Actually one of the people that we’re going to speak to right now is Adele. We met this week, didn’t we, Adele. I spent a glorious couple of hours with you and Molly, your daughter.

Adele- It was lovely. Absolutely it was a pleasure yes.

Nikki- It was so nice to meet you. And you are, as Emma was just mentioning there, you’re a single mum. It is you and Molly. I know you have a little bit of help but you are majoritively the person that looks after your daughter, it’s you and her together.

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Nikki- I know as well from being physically disabled that equipment takes a lot of energy. Now, I have a lot of equipment Adele, but you have got more equipment than I’ve ever seen. Tell us about what you’ve got.

Adele- Okay, so we’ve got two ceiling track hoists, one in the bedroom, one in the lounge. And we have a through floor lift. We’ve got suction machines and Molly’s not able to deal with her secretions very well. And then on top of that we’ve got two chairs that need charging. So, we have an outdoor chair which takes 12 hours to charge, and then we have an indoor chair that needs charging as well.

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Adele- The thing with all this equipment is that unfortunately they have to be on charge, especially the hoists and things like that, have to be on charge 24/7. If the battery goes flat the whole battery will need replacing; you obviously met us on Tuesday. Molly’s considerably bigger than I am, so it would be really hard to push Molly without her battery powered chair. Again the through floor lift has to be used several times a day because that’s the only way I can get Molly upstairs to be able to change her, obviously because she’s incontinent. So, all this equipment is being used several times daily, and it really does add up.

±·¾±°ì°ì¾±-Ìý³Û±ð²¹³ó. And all the washing as well that you have, extraordinary amounts.

Adele- Of course, yeah, absolutely. Molly she has fresh bedding every single day. If Moly soils herself I’ve then got to, as I say, take her up in the lift, change her. That’s a fresh change of clothes. If she was to soil herself during the night that’s a bed change during the night. So, we’ve got at least three washing loads a day.

Nikki- And tell us a bit about Molly and her disability, her condition.

Adele- Molly has got a progressive neurological condition, which is terminal unfortunately, called Batten’s disease. Molly now has lost her ability to walk, talk. She’s now gastronomy fed. She’s incontinent, and unfortunately she suffers a lot of seizures and has also lost her eyesight.

Nikki- Your relationship with Molly is just wonderful. You make her laugh all the time. And I know you make the best of the situation that you guys are in right now. But I’m just wondering how it feels for you as a mum with a daughter who has got a life-limiting condition. You obviously want to make the best of the years that you guys have got left together, but you’re in this predicament. There’s nothing really you can do about it.

Adele- No, absolutely.

Nikki- It is what it is, isn’t it?

Adele- It is.

Nikki- The prices are rising and you need the money to be able to afford this extra power that you need to use.

Adele- Absolutely. So, it’s a kind of toss up between do you put fuel in the car to take Molly out for day trips, which is so needed really. Batten’s disease is a form of childhood dementia so it’s really important to keep Molly’s brain stimulated and occupied. Without that that’s just going to make Molly deteriorated at a significantly faster pace. So, we have no choice but to kind of forfeit days out and nice sensory experiences for Molly to make sure we’ve got enough money to be able to cover the fuel bills.

Nikki- I want to bring in Dan now as well. Because Dan, you also need equipment for your daughter, Emily. First of all tell us a bit about Emily and why you need to use so much more power than someone without a disabled child.

Dan- Absolutely. But first I’d just like to say I think Adele and her family are just phenomenal human beings and I wish them all the absolute very best, I really do.

Adele- Oh god bless. And you too, Dan.

Dan- I’ll be honest this week has seen – sorry give me a minute – seen my mental health actually hit a rock bottom.

Nikki- Oh Dan.

Dan- Because of this situation. Emily herself is a constant laugh, a constant giggle. She is turning into a teenager with all the grumpiness that comes with it. but yes Emily has spina bifida and hydrocephalus Chiari malformation and autism. She has a BiPAP ventilator, which is a little connection that goes over her nose to keep her lungs filled with oxygen. That runs 12 hours constantly at night. It’s just constant eating of energy. Energy literally is a lifesaver; it’s not a luxury. And we just cannot switch it off. If we switch off every single piece of equipment our children need the consequences are just horrific for mental and physical decline. It’s just ridiculously unfair. And with the costs of bills as well, ours has gone up by £300. Someone messaged me the other day to say, a single mother again like Adele, whose electricity and gas bill has risen to £1,062 a month for her and her disabled child. It’s just ghastly.

Nikki- What are you having to do to save money where you can?

Dan- The last few months the heating has actually been off. Turning off the ceiling track hoist. And as Adele was saying about her beautiful daughter, our children are not small anymore, they’re tall, so the ceiling track hoist had to go off and I’ve been having to lift Emily from the bed to the wheelchair to a shower chair and back again. And the back pain is excruciating. I mean, with the heating off Emily cannot regulate her body temperature so I’ve actually been using a hairdryer on a low warm setting to warm her feet every night before I cover her socks, because otherwise her legs will go purple and the circulation will just stop.  And you can’t think long term; you just have to think hour by hour and minute by minute to plan your child’s day without things that would help with their mobility, but because of the cost of everything you have to turn that off and keep it to the extreme things that they really need, like the ventilator, like the throat clearing things, like that. It’s just what will keep my child basically alive but not mobile for today. And that’s the situation we’re in.

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Dan- And it’s not only affecting them, but it’s affecting us and it’s affecting the people around us. It’s just no way to live.

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Nikki- I know that Contact, the charity that put this survey out, along with other organisations, have written to the Chancellor asking for benefits to be raised in line with inflation. Would you agree that that’s what needs to happen?

Dan- The benefits would have to go above inflation, by at least say 10%, just at least get families like ours and like Adele’s just a chance at catch up with anything. Because it’s not just fuel, it’s the food; food prices are rising as well. We got to a place called the Trash Café near us now, which just takes in all food that’s potentially going to be thrown out from local supermarkets, and we just go there now armed with a £10 note and just buy a box of stuff that’s out of date and bring that home. But benefits need to go up, but they need to really go up to allow us just to play catch up to these escalating prices.

Nikki- Dan and Adele, thank you so much for sharing your story and being so honest.

Dan- Can I just ask one thing, if Adele doesn’t mind, if she’s quite happy she can have my details and my email if she wants to continue a solidarity conversation? I’m more than happy.

Adele- That would be lovely, absolutely.

Dan- What we need right now is community more than anything else.

Nikki- Oh Dan.

Adele- Sending hugs sweetheart.

Nikki- Me too, Dan. Stay in touch with us Dan, okay? And you Adele, both of you, let us know how you’re doing, okay?

Adele- Definitely, yes.

Nikki- And stay strong.

Emma- Nikki, you mentioned earlier a letter that the charities are going to send to the Chancellor, so charities like Contact and Scope and Mencap and many others. And they’re suggesting that the £200 energy rebate that the government is giving should be a non-repayable grant for disabled people. They are, as you mentioned, asking for benefits to go up with inflation. And they’re also asking the government to revisit their criteria for the warm home scheme as well.

Nikki- Emma, what are the government saying about this?

Emma- Well, the government sent us a statement and they said that they’re committed to making the UK more accessible and inclusive for disabled people. They said that they have provided £22 billion to help low income families, and almost £9 billion of that is around helping with energy bills. Just to say, Nikki, those figures are for families in general rather than for disabled families in particular. The government did mention the cold weather payment which happens when the weather goes below zero for seven days in a row. And they’ve also mentioned the warm home scheme which comes from your energy provider. And the eligibility around that is really quite complicated, so it’s best to go through your energy provider to find out where you are with it to be honest.

Nikki- Very, very complicated. Thank you, Emma. Now, this is such an important story, so important, so we’re going to keep revisiting it. And you can get in touch with us about your experiences. We’d love, love, love to hear from you. I know it’s a terribly tough time and it’s sometimes very hard to talk about something so personal like your finances and situation that you’re in. But pleased do and we would love to speak to you. Email us accessall@bbc.co.uk. And thank you again Adele and Dan, and thank you to Alice Cuddy as well at the ±«Óãtv UK Insight team for digging into this story for us.

music-

Send an email to Nikki, accessall@bbc.co.uk.

Nikki- Now, Emma I want to talk about gyms because I read an article the other day that said sitting down will kill you. So, there’s not much hope for me.

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Nikki- But if you think back to London 2012, the Paralympics, there was all this talk about getting fit and getting active. I just remember at the time I was desperate to get a job at Channel 4, but that never worked out. But it was very much about that, wasn’t it?

Emma- Oh, it was huge. I was there. I was reporting on the Paralympics, and there was this real sense and a real feeling, probably more from non-disabled people than disabled people, but that it was going to change the world for disabled people, it was going to give us more access to physical activity and to sport. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that to be honest at the time because I’ve never been particularly sporty. A lot of money was pumped in before the Paralympics to sport and disability sport to try and get people really excited about the Games and get kids to know what all the Paralympic sports were, and there was a bit pumped after and the legacy stuff. In 2013 70% of disabled people wanted to be more active; in 2021 78%. So, I don’t know whether more people want to do exercise or whether some people have stopped and therefore the percentage is higher because the ones who have stopped are like actually I’d like to get back into it. So, I’m not sure what’s going on there. But I don’t think it was as huge a change in the number of people being active as some people expected it to be.

Nikki- I would just like a left bicep, that would be nice. I mean anything, I’ll take anything. I remember I did do a film for ±«Óãtv News and we came to the conclusion that the only Paralympic sport I could do was boccia, which I thoroughly enjoyed.

Emma- Do you know what, it’s the gym thing. I think the gym thing for me, right, it’s just I can’t get in the door. My brain just brings up all of these sort of reasons why I shouldn’t go to the gym and why I can’t go to the gym. Do you want to know what my reasons are?

Nikki- Yeah, I do.

Emma- Because I bet you some of them are the same as yours.

Nikki- I’m sure they are, yeah.

Emma- So, I suppose knowing which gym to start with, because you’re sick of fighting battles and you’re tired, and you don’t want to turn up at four different gyms for the first three to sort of not look after you and not welcome you and you not to be able to use them. And then getting there, I’ve lost a lot of my confidence in the pandemic getting around with my cane, so the idea of having to get somewhere to work out. 

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Emma- Yeah, I know but lots of people have I think. Or maybe it’s just me, I don’t know, but I don’t think so. And then when you’re in there the idea of getting changed in a communal changing room and moving around and trying to find the locker and accidentally touching someone who might be just out of the shower or something like that. Oh my gosh, I’m not able. And then if you’re on the equipment, you’re using the equipment and then you want to go onto the next thing, how do you know whether it’s free? How do you know if the next equipment is suitable for you? How do you flag up some help to go and get to that next piece of equipment without going, hello, blind girl needs help now? Do you know what I mean?

Nikki- Yeah, I do.

Emma- Just there’s so many. Do I look weird in my gym clothes? Because I don’t know what I look like. Do I use the equipment in a weird way because I’ve never seen anybody else use it? So, I’ve been shown how to use it. I’ve heard of blind people learning how to play the guitar upside down by accident. Do you know what I mean? Even at 40 years old, nearly, I still worry about what I look like and I worry about people looking at me.

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Emma- Yeah. So, I can’t even get in the door, Nikki.

Nikki- I’ve got a thing, I’m 42 now Emma, and I just think I’m at peace with myself now. But gyms are a completely different ballgame. I remember I used to go, back in the days when I used to walk – and when I say walk, Emma, I mean wobble; I barely stayed on my feet – but my mum and I were like, let’s do it. So, we used to go to a local gym in Hayes and I wobbled in there, and I remember feeling really self-conscious. At the time I could only wear these really unattractive, they looked like orthopaedic shoes, so I couldn’t even wear trainers. And I had those, you know those really shiny 80s tracksuit bottoms, and a belly top. Because quite frankly I was disabled but I had a banging belly. I don’t know where that came from, but it was quite a strong looking thing. But yeah, I used to get really self-conscious as a physically disabled person who wanted to use the machines but potentially in a different way. Like I could use the pull-down machine. I remember I loved that machine, it gave me some cracking shoulders, but I couldn’t use the pull-down with any weights. 

But I do remember at that particular gym there was a very lovely member of staff who was an older guy, and he was brilliant. He just really kind of showed me the way. And I think that’s very much what you need. Going into a gym now as somebody that uses a scooter to get around and would need help getting on and off the equipment I mean, I can’t even imagine it, Emma, to be honest.

Emma- I know. So, maybe you need someone like Dale, our guest, do you think?

Nikki- Yes. We are going to speak to Dale Robertson now. Dale runs Inclusive Fitness which is a specialist gym for disabled people, but it’s in Edinburgh. Dale, you can’t be in Edinburgh, please come down south for me.

Emma- Good for me.

Nikki- Good for the people of Edinburgh. Good for Emma.

Emma- Because it’s the other side of Edinburgh. This is what I’m talking about, I’d make excuses any how or way: he’s the other side of Edinburgh therefore no, sorry, can’t do it.

Nikki- Now, Dale your gym is a specialist one, isn’t it? How is it different? Explain how it works.

Dale- So, we specialise in one-to-one and small group and adapted fitness classes for disabled people and people with long-term health conditions. And we kind of look at it from a more functionality side of things, how what we do in the gym can have a positive impact on daily living for example, some of the stuff you were talking about, and help things like transfer, range of movement, pain management. We’ve got some adapted equipment which isn’t in commercial gyms which should be in commercial gyms. You wouldn’t be the only disabled person in the gym, which makes a big difference. But I think the fact that we offer some peer support. So, for instance after our adapted fitness classes we’ll have half an hour where we just make a coffee, have a coffee and a chat and set the world to rights.

Emma- I was picking your brains earlier and you were saying that you can bring the sound down or you can bring the lighting down.

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Emma- You can change the feel of the gym if someone’s got sensory.

Dale- Yes, I’ve got an autistic client who it needs to be just me and him in the gym. So, again we can control the variables in terms of noise, pollution and the lighting and things like that.

Nikki- And what made you decide to set a specialist gym up? How did it all come about?

Dale- I’d done sports coaching as a degree, and there was a wee girl in one of our classes that I was coaching and she was a wheelchair user. We were coaching tennis and she never really took part, usually she was a referee or she would just stand and watch. And then at the weekend I asked her if she would like to take part and she could hit the ball as well as the rest of her classmates. So, kind of from then was when I first started to realise that in that instance she wasn’t disabled by her disability, she wasn’t able to take part because she never had any support or knowledge.

Nikki- A very social model, Dale.

Dale- So, it kind of came from that.

Emma- I was talking about this to him the other day and he was like, ‘I do not want this to be inspiration porn’. And I was like go Dale, go Dale.

±·¾±°ì°ì¾±-Ìý³Û±ð²¹³ó. 

Dale- You can’t normalise that disabled person being in a gym if they’re there being an inspiration to everybody else.

Nikki- How do you reckon you could get someone like Emma and me really into a gym? How are you going to do it?

Dale- I persuade a lot of my clients by putting boxing gloves on them and a body pad on me, so that kind of gets a bit of motivation going.

Nikki- That sounds fun.

Dale- The gym is not supposed to add stress, it’s supposed to take it away. So, finding an environment that’s accessible in the first place would be the first step. But I’ve always said as well a good PT should be able to programme for a disabled person; it’s just getting over the barriers to communication and language, and there are still some social barriers there as well. So, finding a good PT that’s willing to listen to you as the expert in your condition is half the battle.

Nikki- Thank  you so much. And if you’ve got any plans to expand will you tap me and Emma up?

Dale- Yeah, I sure will. I think I’ll need to sooner rather than later.

Emma- Yeah, I think I could do with your help to be honest.

Nikki- We’re knocking on a bit love, so hurry up. Take care Dale. So, what about the costs of gyms, Em?

Emma- Yeah, you know what, the average gym membership now is £40 a month, and lots and lots of disabled people can’t afford that. The cost of living is going up so much and benefits aren’t coming up to meet it, are they, so that’s a struggle for lots of people. There are things in place, a set of gyms call Better Gym who run lots of gyms for local authorities, they have an inclusive tariff, which is actually a free tariff. But then other authorities have their own concessions for disabled people as well. And then Disability Rights UK they have a Get Yourself Active campaign, and they do a lot of work with the social care sector to explain to them and to make sure that decision makers know that if a gym membership is agreed in someone’s care plan they can use their direct payments to pay for that or their personal budgets. If it’s agreed in your health plan, if your needs are mostly medical and if it’s agreed that it’s a health need, you could also get it in your health budget as well if that’s where you get your help from. But lots of people will struggle to do that because of the way things are.

Nikki- Emma that was great. That felt good.

Music-

Access All with Nikki Fox.

Nikki- Hello Briony, how are you? Oh my goodness, Briony.

Emma- What has she got? What has she got?

Nikki- She has got the snazziest leggings on. I mean, I’m a leopard print wearer.

Briony- Literally everything in my wardrobe is leopard print.

Nikki- I like your hair, I like your leggings, I like your boots.

Briony- Stop it, stop it. I love you!

Nikki- Okay. Can you see Emma there as well, Briony?

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Briony- Hello lovely. How are you?

Emma- I’m good. 

Briony- Is it your birthday today?

Emma- Yes, it is my birthday today.

Briony- Happy birthday.

Emma- Oh thank you.

Nikki- Now, you are all going to love my next guest. She’s got the snazziest leopard print leggings on I’ve ever seen: TV presenter, baker extraordinaire, and soon to be podcast host – I can’t wait to talk about that – Briony May Williams. Hello.

Briony- Hello lovey.

Nikki- And she brought a cake in. I just love you so much.

Briony- I did bring cake. Because that’s usually the first question people ask: they say, ‘have you got any cake?’. And I go ‘no, I’m really sorry’. But I thought do you know what, today for you I’m going to bring it in.

Nikki- Oh Briony. People ask me whether I’ve got a spare scooter, which I always find a bit weird really.

Briony- That is a bit weird.

Nikki- Like I’d have a spare one in my back pocket.

Briony- You’d have one, yeah, you’ve got some sort of flat-pack Ikea one hidden in the boot of yours.

Emma- People just ask me if I can see in my dreams. That’s mostly what they ask me.

Briony- Well, I’m delighted to be here. Thank you for inviting me.

Nikki- You’ve had a meteoric rise. I love this, Briony.

Briony- It’s been bonkers. It’s been completely nuts. And I thought oh, after the pandemic it’ll just all sort of cool off. And then it hasn’t.

Nikki- No, because Briony, you are bloody brilliant. I got you something as well. I baked it.

Briony- Oh my god, that’s so exciting. I love it when other people bake.

Nikki- Yeah, why not. Let’s bring it in.

Briony- Yeah, why not?

Nikki- Livy Loo, my lovely PA, you couldn’t bring my lovely cake that I baked for Briony?

Briony- Oh my gosh, I’m so excited.

Nikki- Well, I see your cakes and I raise you this cake. The intricacies.

Briony- Now, now, now, Nikki, I think we need to have a chat. Have you just taken a little roll of wrapping off round the outside?

Nikki- Briony, you spotted that straightaway.

Briony- A mile off.

Nikki- How did you spot that a mile away? I was going to talk about the intricacies of those little chocolate bits.

Briony- Well tell me, yeah, tell me. Describe to me how you made them.

Nikki- I melted down some chocolate. And then what did I do, Livy? And then I rolled it on a board.

Briony- And then I went to M&S and then I bought it.

livy- Cake mix for about 25p.

Nikki- And then I went to my local. Yeah, I know.

Briony- It looks lovely.

Nikki- I wanted to pass it off but you spotted me, you rumbled me.

Briony- I’m so sorry. I got you straightaway.

Emma- I’ll take Briony’s cake, Nikki, thanks.

Briony- That chocolate one looks lush.

Nikki-  No, to be honest Briony’s looks a gazillion times better. Now, live TV you’ve just started doing. You had a stint on Morning Live, was it with the lovely Gethin?

Briony- With the very lovely Gethin, and very supportive, because I’m not going to lie, I was so nervous.

Nikki- Were you? Now, tell me about it, what were the feelings? Because I remember first time for me, live TV on the One Show, autocue, I’m dyslexic as well, was horrifying.

Briony- It’s terrifying. And it’s not just the autocue; it’s the people in your ear as well.

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Briony- That really threw me, so you’ve got like five people in your ear counting down and telling you this and telling you that. And then you’re opposite blooming Gethin Jones making sure you don’t want to mess up. Then you realise all these people are watching at home and it’s like, argh! So, I just had to go into almost sort of autopilot, calm down and just do it.

Nikki- Let’s have a little listen.

gethin- Hello and welcome to Morning Live on a Tuesday. And she’s escaped the country, Briony May Williams, it’s lovely to see you. That’s where we usually see you is out in the country in the nice weather. But you’ve come to the city and it’s a bit cloudy today.

Briony- It is a little bit, but that’s all right. Manchester have let me in. I’m excited.

Gethin- Can you live with that?

Briony- I can.

Nikki- Is that strange listening back? Because I know obviously you were in the Bake Off semi-final in 2018.

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Nikki- Amazing. But before then TV wasn’t your thing, was it?

Briony- No. This all seems still like a very surreal dream, because I was a teacher before. I taught French and Spanish at a secondary school. I loved it, I was so happy, it was my dream job. Then I had my daughter. But then when she was two I applied for Bake Off. And then when I look back now and I think how bonkers, if you’d said to me – because I was filming Bake Off four years ago at the moment, so every weekend – if you’d told me then what would be happening now I’d have been like shut up, don’t be silly.

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µþ°ù¾±´Ç²Ô²â-Ìý³Û±ð²¹³ó. I’m having a blast. I’m riding that wave and enjoying every minute, thank you.

Nikki- I need some tips from you because it’s taken me 150 years to get to this point now in my career. Honestly I could have walked quicker than my career. But give me some tips after this.

Now, as well we’re talking obviously about limb difference; is that how you describe?

Briony- I call it my little hand.

Nikki- Love it.

Briony- I’ve always called it my little hand; that’s just how we referred to it me growing up. I would call it a limb difference now. Because I was a member of Reach, which is a charity for children with upper limb differences, when I was younger. So, that’s when I started to meet other people who had something similar. I was like, oh, other people do exist. Because there was obviously no one on the TV at that time. So, that’s what I’ve always called it.

Nikki- Do you think much about it? Like when you were on Bake Off you didn’t really go into much about it at all, did you?

Briony- No. Well, before the show started they said, ‘do you need any extra help at all or do you just want to…?’ and I was like, I just want to go in and bake, I don’t want any fuss. People are going to notice at some point, but most people didn’t notice until week two or three. People were tweeting like, ‘I’m sure Briony had a hand last week’. No, not there wasn’t some horrific accident with the blender between week one and week two. Because I just wanted to be like no, it’s just there, just leave it. And then when it was released and the press were like, oh can we call her the disabled baker. Okay, but can’t it just be stay at home mum who happens to have a disability?

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Briony- I feel very differently now than I did prior to Bake Off. Growing up my mum wouldn’t use the word disabled or disability. I was born in 1984, still very much felt like a dirty word, it was a negative word. And in my mum’s head if she called me disabled it’s almost like that would make me more disabled. I think that’s why we called it my little hand. So, then growing up she would always be like, just figure out your own way of doing it; if you can’t do something, like tying your shoelaces. So, I learnt to tie my shoelaces at the same time as my older brother, who has two fully functioning hands – we like to bring that up a lot. So, that’s how I’ve always kind of gone through life. And I’m very lucky I think in that I can put my hand in my pocket and no one would know. So, for me I would hide behind that sort of like, oh well I don’t really need to call it a disability because it doesn’t really stop me doing anything. And then when I was on Bake Off this amazing community opened up to me of people with disabilities, and I was like this is incredible. And I was like, I’ve been given this amazing platform from Bake Off, I want to use that for good. I’m an ambassador for Reach now. I get parents reaching out to me on social media saying, ‘I’m so glad my daughter has seen you on TV because honestly, the difference it has made just seeing someone like her on TV’. And why wouldn’t you want to use that?

And now I would shout from the rooftops, yes I’m a disabled person. And I’m so proud of that. And it’s because mainly of the way that the community kind of embraced me and went, awesome, hey.

Nikki- Go Briony.

Briony- Go, let’s go, let’s do this. Another one of us on TV – check.

Nikki- It’s interesting that it’s become such a positive word for you.

Briony- It’s something I celebrate now; whereas before I was ashamed of it. And if I walked into a club in my late teens, early 20s I’d get my friends to hold my hand so that no one would see because I was so, you know. Or photos of me you wouldn’t see me with my hand showing.

Nikki- It's great getting older as well, isn’t it?

Briony- Isn’t it?

Nikki- Don’t you just love it?

Briony- I love it. I look back now and I just want to slap myself and be like, stop being so ridiculous.

Nikki- Now, Briony, I cannot let you go without talking about your new pod, because this podcast is so exciting.

Briony- It’s so exciting. And I still am a little bit amazed that it’s happening and that they’ve asked me to host it. It’s so exciting.

Nikki- Go on, tell me about it. Mark Watson is doing it with you.

Briony- It’s Mark Watson and his partner, Leanne. And they’ve started it, it’s called the 13 Million Club.

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Briony- Which I know you’ll know, refers to the 13 million people who identify as disabled in the UK.

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Briony- And also after the statistic that apparently 50% of people in the UK say they don’t know anyone with a disability.

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Briony- Yeah, which is bonkers, isn’t it, when you think about it.

Nikki- I’ve heard some unusual stats, especially the ones about sleeping with someone disabled. But that one…okay. And I think it may be even slightly more than 13 million as well. You should call it the…

Briony- Yeah, the Over 13 Million Club. I’ll have a word with Mark. It’s going to be quite a lively chat and I think Mark and Leanne have described it as anarchic. So, there are going to be stand-up elements, talk about current affairs. There’s a part where we’re talking about disabilities that people don’t really know what they are.

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Briony- It’s going to be amazing. And the first episode is being recorded in front of a live audience at a comedy club. It’s all disabled talent, and it’s just going to be superb. I literally can’t wait.

Nikki- When is it starting?

Briony- We’re recording the first episode on 11th May. And you can get tickets. You can actually apply. They’re free. It’s in Bethnal Green at the Backyard Comedy Club it’s called. So, if you’d like to get a ticket they’re free. If you go onto my Twitter, which is @BrionyMayBakes you can find all the links there.

Nikki- Amazing. And it will be broadcast?

Briony- Yeah, it’s going to be ±«Óãtv Sounds.

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Emma- So, there will be a bit of a fight for the top spot on ±«Óãtv Sounds then.

Briony- Oh I know, we’re going to be fighting now. We’re all friends.

Nikki- And I’ve got some really good disabled gags, so if you ever want me Briony, tap me up, okay?

Briony- Oh my god, I’m going to tap you right up.

Nikki- Thanks babe. Briony, thank you so, so much. You’ve been an absolute treat to talk to and I’m going to eat your cake.

Now, Access All’ers – I think that’s what we’re going to call you; we haven’t come up with a better name to be honest – but we’re going to interview all the big names in the world of disability and mental health on this podcast, including I really hope Lady Gaga. She’s got fibromyalgia; she’s got a lot of stuff to say.

Briony- Get her on.

Nikki- Well, we’ve got a bid in. I know someone who knew someone who knew someone who knew her agent, so come on Gaga, if you’re listening, come on the pod. We’re going to start a campaign: get Gaga on.

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Nikki- Do you know Gaga?

Briony- Unfortunately not, no. I wish I knew Lady Gaga.

Nikki- If you ever meet her tap her up.

Briony- I will. I’ll be like I need you to talk to Nikki.

Nikki- Anyone got any links please let us know. We’d also love to hear your stories. You can contact us now via WhatsApp on 0330 123 9480. I couldn’t say that in a catchy way. We want to hear you so send us a voice message if you can. That number again: 0330 123 9480. Or of course you can email us: accessall@bbc.co.uk.

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Nikki- See you next week

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