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How comfortable do you feel talking about debt?

Clare Seal used to find it impossible. But after building up £25,000 of credit card bills she came to the realisation that her relationship with money was “fundamentally broken” and she had to do something drastic.

Clare set up an Instagram account called to hold herself accountable and share her experience and now has more than 55,000 followers. She shares some of the things she’s learned with Woman’s Hour…

“My debt has always been a source of anxiety and shame and secrecy,” says Clare, who admits she spent years burying her head in the sand.

“I’ve never had a very good relationship with money. I didn’t have an idea about how to budget or how to live within my means when I went to university. Just real incremental overspending. And added on top of that came big life milestones - childcare and a wedding - [which] really ramped up the amount of debt.”

Originally posting anonymously, Clare now has more than 50,000 followers on . She writes a lot about the emotions connected with spending money, as well as the shame many women associate with it.

“I couldn’t talk about money for a long time. It was too material, too embarrassing. I was paralysed. I didn’t feel able to be open with friends and family. Writing online, it felt cathartic to get it out. And Instagram had been a spending trigger for me so it felt good to turn that around.”

Clare - who has now paid off more than £10,000 of her own debt - has just published her book Real Life Money. Here she shares some tried and tested advice to help others struggling with their finances...

1. Face up to your debt

“When you’re dealing with a significant amount of debt it feels overwhelming,” says Clare.

“I think the worst thing that you can do is be in denial about it. Not only is the situation getting materially worse but you’re probably feeling more anxious.

“I looked after the family finances and was always juggling to pay bills and ignoring how big the problem was. My husband and I shared parental leave with our second son and after he’d gone back to work I had a call from our bank and had to face the fact there was no more juggling to be done.

“I needed to dig quite deep as to why things had got so bad in order to change them,” she adds. “[But] for the first time ever I can see a financial future.”

2. Speak to your bank or credit card company

“People feel embarrassed to tell banks they’re struggling. [But] it’s a bit like going to your GP - they deal with it all the time. They will have dealt with people in far worse positions than you. It’s their job to help.

Get rid of any subscription services you aren’t using - especially at the moment.

“If you call and talk them through your situation, often they will give you a refund on a late payment fine. They might be able to refund up to 12-months of charges, which can be a much needed boost.”

3. But plan what you are going to say first

“Before you call them you should have, written down preferably, what you are going to say and what you would like the outcome to be. If you find this very emotional, which a lot of people do about money, it’s really easy to get flustered and frustrated,” says Clare.

“If you’re paying a really high amount of interest [on credit cards] and it’s really impeding your ability to pay off any of your balance, you might ask if there is a lower interest rate they can offer you, or if they are able to freeze your interest for a couple of months. I’ve had people tell me their interest has been reduced from something like 25% down to 6%, which if you have a big balance you can imagine the difference that can make.”

4. Keep on top of bills and audit your subscriptions

“Just spending £50 more than you should over time makes an incredible amount of difference. Use a switch service to keep on top of your bills. By getting the best gas, electricity and broadband deals, you can save hundreds of pounds per year,” says Clare.

“Get rid of any subscription services you aren’t using - especially at the moment. Often if you go to unsubscribe from services like NowTV or Audible, they’ll offer you a slashed price for a fixed period to tempt you to stay.”

5. Don’t always buy new

“I now automatically check eBay and Facebook Marketplace to see if I can find things I need or want secondhand. You can pay just a fraction of the price for the same item and it can save you a lot of money.

“There was a dress I really wanted for a wedding. I found it in my size, worn once for £14 instead of £85. Some things, of course, it is good to buy new, but where you can buy second hand, there’s also an environmental benefit too.”

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