Michael Buchanan
reports from Ascension Island tonight and tomorrow, to celebrate the birthdays today of Molly, Jason Good, and Big Sis.
To help us all along, Michael's sent some pictures:
"Ok, first things first. Its not cold and there are no penguins. Apparently these are the 2 questions people on Ascension Island get asked most by outsiders."
"Its just a few degrees south of the equator, and as they enter the winter, its an acceptable 27 degrees Celsius as I write this, sipping an incredibly cheap beer (think less than a quid!) 
As you can see from this picture, the Island is a barren volcanic rock that's used as a communications hotspot by various companies and organisations including the ±«Óãtv World Service, Cable and Wireless and GCHQ. So sitting on the top of many of these ash pits, you'll see masts, transmitters and golf balls, 
intercepting all kinds of communications, possibly including this email (Morning chaps)."
Ascension came to prominence during the Falklands war, which we'll be talking about tonight on PM, as a crucial logistical and re-fuelling stop for British troops on the way to fighting the Argentineans. As you'll hear, the conflicted necessitated the whole island getting beside the military, which they apparently did with gusto. Ascension will be holding it own official Falkland commemoration on Sunday, when the newly refurbished flag-pole will be put to use for the first time. Hundreds are expected.
In lieu of failing to show you any penguins, have a look at this land crab
which was taking its time to cross the road the other day. They travel 6 miles down to the Atlantic to hatch, leave their eggs and then travel back to this hills. Once the young are born, they too head for the hills. How they know where to go, nobody can tell me. I have my own theory. With all these communication satellites dotted over the island, they simply use sat nav."
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Good heavens, the ±«Óãtv are pushing the boat out for us, aren't they? However, Eddie, I think I might have preferred another venue for my birthday, so will stay back here in good ole Blighty, despite the grey skies.
But if there's a spare crab willing to donate it's life to me, a fresh crab salad for lunch would go down very well ;o)
My very best wishes to Michael Buchanan, and I'll listen to his reports with interest. (Oh, and I do know why he's really there - all to do with another anniversary)
Well the history of the wireless repeater station is fascinating.
I've just read this from the ±«Óãtv's peoples war site.
In 1942, John Trevor Liney was stationed at the Wireless Receiving Station on Ascension Island.
The Ascension Island Radio Transmitter and Receiver Station was part of the Cable and Wireless HF radio-telecommunications worldwide network. The station operated in conjunction with similar units in Freetown and Accra on the West African Coast.
The main purpose of this station was to receive and relay transatlantic bulletins in code and cypher for the benefit of Allied shipping, both Merchant and Naval. The "traffic" concerned was received and re-transmitted using taped Morse Code.
Trevor had just completed his Signals Training in the UK Being the least experienced person on the station, he was allocated to the 500 KC's distress frequency, which, for the most part, involved just listening. A manual transmitting key was provided.
On October 10, 1942, he was the only telegraphist T. O. (trained officer) on duty on Ascension. Perhaps feeling a little bored, he occasionally changed frequencies, switching to the nearby working marine frequency band, in order to find any signals to help pass the time.
He was not on the distress frequency of 500 KC's, when he stumbled upon a fast fading SOS signal. This signal was being sent "off" frequency, so the chances of anyone hearing it were very remote. The signal was fading fast, but Trevor recorded what he hoped were the correct coordinates and reported them to his superiors.
Although aircraft from the US Army based on the Island made an early search, no trace of a ship was found. Trevor began to accept that perhaps his Morse or his hearing had let him down. Then he learned that the HMS Corinthian, using his coordinates, went to that area and found more than 20 lifeboats with 820 survivors from the Duchess of Atholl. The survivors had been in the lifeboats for about 28 hours.
It was later confirmed that there was no time to send a message from the ship's radio. The SOS signal was sent from a portable transmitter in one of the lifeboats, and its battery was almost completely discharged. The ship had been sunk in an extremely remote location, and Trevor was in the only land station where the signal could possibly have been intercepted, other than a nearby ship.
Jonnie: wow, great story.
Eddie: thanks for the name checks and the birthday wishes. Three Geminis all together would make for a very confusing conversation, don't you think?
Never yet eaten crab or indeed lobster. Any food that requires carpentry tools rather than cutlery being a little beyond me. And I've never been taken by the story that "that sound" is just air escaping from the shell...
Because of the size of my screen, I could see just the top of the first picture and the headline.
I am disappointed to find that the picture is of a hill, and not the follicly-challenged top of Michael Buchanan's well-shaped head.
For all I know Michael may not even be bald!
Ah, the bonus of blogging on the wireless...
Fifi
Jason (Birthday Buddy): I always feel terribly guilty about my love of crab and lobster - but then again as I'm not a vegetarian, I'm guilty of a lot else besides. Now for the Annie Hall moment - I've even cooked crab and lobster, but cannot now bring myself to do this.
I blame this taste for crustaceans on a childhood living by the sea and many years living by the mediterranean. It's difficult to kick these habits.
Thank you to Michael. I like the crab; quite acceptable, and tastier than penguin.
I also like Michael's reports and his voice reminds me of many happy times spent in the West Highlands and Western Isles. Of Scotland - you'll have guessed that.
So - no polar bears, either?
;o)
Hmmmmm- nice blue sky, I suppose.......
Mollyxx
Could we go soemwhere hot, sunny and conflict free for my birthday (end of August so plenty of time to plan!)
Eddie:
I hope Michael's going to report on the facts that Ascension Islanders have no representation in parliament and no "right-of-abode" and that plans in the 1990's to introduce these were dropped as being too expensive.
As a result, the islanders can be chucked off at the whim of the MoD/FO, much as the islanders of Diego Garcia once were.
Oh, and...
Happy birthday Molly, Jason & Big Sis
According to Alan Clark in his "Diaries- into politics", there is some tropical forest and an 18th Century west-country farmhouse somewhere on the island.
Well I was looking for a picture of Michael Buchanan to satisfy Fifi's curiousity - and then discovered this article on the web!
Can this be the same Michael Buchanan and is it true I wonder?
Taken from this website:-
BARRA-bred Michael Buchanan recently treated listeners to Radio 4's Andy Peebles show to 20 minutes of muttering and cursing when he inadvertently pressed the over-ride button in the studio where he was editing a news report for the station.
His boss, Rod Liddle, defended the teuchter as "a great reporter" but added the proviso:
"Let's hope he never gets a job in a nuclear power station."
Viewers of ±«Óãtv Scotland's Gaelic current affairs programme, Erpa, may remember another highlight of Buchanan's stellar career - a Bafta Scotland award for a documentary about, erm, Chernobyl.
Here's a link to a little photo of the man ....
I knew a Dr Buchanan, plastic surgeon. Can you ascend beyond that?
Jonnie (2) - Love the story, Jonnie.
Even though we are all cynical, empirically driven fact-bunnies now, I hope there is still room for us to accept that we can't yet explain everything. Because of the circumstances he found himself in - open, clear mind - perhaps his instinct took over. We are too quick to label such things as hocus-pocus, when, let's face it, 300 years ago radio would have been viewed the same way.
A very Happy birthday Molly, Jason and the lovely Big Sis.
Charles Hatton (14): Lovely as she undoubtedly is, Big Sis doesn't monopolise this feature...I'm sure Molly is and I know I am too ;-)
See! All the best pictures are on the radio! This is just the kind of thing that makes me love this blog. Thanks Eddie and Michael!
Very good photographs. Thank you.
Ooooooh, Charles, I've come over all gooey! A compliment - much needed today, frankly, is extremely welcome.
I can vouch for Jason's loveliness, and Molly seems lovely too, though I've not met her yet. She bakes a mean cake!
Now then, I seem to remember Appy got a huggis from Eddie one day when she really needed it ...... How I could do with one today, folks.
Well, thank you Big Sister and Jonnie.
Looks like the man's a Scot who knows how to swear a bit -- AND he has a well-shaped head, though more hirsute than I'd imagined.
Could be worse I suppose!
I am trying to decide whether to decamp my office to the gazebo for the rest of the afternoon. Would it seem too much like skiving, I wonder?
Being one's own boss can be a pain, too, sometimes....
Fifi
Fifi - go for it - Nothing like working outdoors in this glorious weather .
BigSis - I dare say Eric is still busy helping prepare the wireless programme.
As you were 'begging somewhat' all the Froggers have combined to give you a group hug.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((O:))))))))))))))))))))))))
Fifi,
"Being one's own boss can be a pain, too, sometimes...."
Relax, it'll pass.
xx
ed
jonnie, you clever man, it must be Barra-born Michael. He definitely sounds Western Isles, but I haven't got the knowledge to distinguish further.
I like the story.
How's the b-day going? And yours, Big Sis? (I typed 'Bib Sis' at first, which must be a sign that you'll be having a slap-up feast with lashings of ginger beer later)
Bib Sis, my arms hurt. Can I stop hugging now?
Relax, it'll pass.
Good advice for the constipated too.
I see he's fallen victim to he ±«Óãtv radio camera again, although raher than losing the top of his head he's lost his chin.
Happy birthday to all those froggers celebrating today. I'm celebrating too as I have at last done my Norwegian homework and can now go and do something fun instead.
Many thanks to Jonnie, (11) for reminding me of an evening of triumphant broadcasting. Given my inability to keep my tongue in check on occasions, I've been extremely careful of what I say on Ascension since I discovered that there is a guy up in court this week for using offensive language. I also heard that Jim Davidson was arrested here in the 1980s for swearing. Apparently he was doing a show to entertain the troops, at the end of which he was marched to the police station, I'm told, much to the amusement of those shrinking violets, the British armed forces.
Thanks as well to Big Sister (12) for digging up that appalling photo. Shortly after starting here, our guru, Marc Settle, asked for some pictures of all the reporters which he said he'd put up on the website. Nothing's appeared, so I can only assume he kept the pictures for himself. He can be a bit like that.
And Stainless Steel Cat (9), I did a piece on Ascension's democratic deficit yesterday, which went out on BH. You can hear it here:
/radio4/news/bh/
Thanks for the link, Michael, and I look forward to your report tomorrow.
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ed
Jason (15)
All froggers, by definition, are, of course, lovely!
And prone to over-use punctuation ...
Except Valery Pedant ... who uses just the right amount.
Michael, you said: "Given my inability to keep my tongue in check on occasions..."
So long as you keep your tongue in CHEEK on appropriate occasions, you'll do OK with us froggers
Michael (26):
Thanks for that! I *knew* I should have been inside listening to BH yesterday rather than digging the garden...
(Of course, if we'd had plenty of trails for that, Mr Trailer-Person-Whose-Name-I've-Forgotten, rather than rotten ±«Óãtv 2 programmes about shops, I'd have known to listen! ;o)
SSC - yes let's go on flogging that dead horse until some life gets back into it. I was appalled to hear that program trailed on the radio again last week although I can't remember if it was actually during PM.If it was I obviously thought, what the h*ll, there's no point in complaining because we did that last week and no-one has taken a blind bit of notice. All they did was tell us that we liked these trailers for TV programs that we have no onterest in watching. Which we know to be untrue.
And note to ±«Óãtv2 program makers. This format worked on 4 with Ramsay because almost everyone is interested in eating out and Ramsay is a big personality and can carry it off. The same things do not apply to independent fashion retailers and whoever it is that presents this prog.
Well, well Charles Hatton - thanks for that! Where have you been for months?
If we're putting in birthday requests, mine's in 15 days.....
Then Gillian's is next month, am I right?
Damn. I deliberately turned off BH as I knew I had a rough day ahead (see Sunday glass box). If only I had known.
But the news is that on the Beach the turtle eggs are hatching!