Paper Monitor
12:04 UK time, Thursday, 31 December 2009
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
It's New Year's Eve, and that means:
- There are fewer bared bosoms in the Daily Star than usual, what with all the coverage of the honours list
- Word play headlines, such as "Status QuO.B.E" in the Daily Mirror
- This is not just cold weather. This is Daily Express Weather© (expl: climatic conditions so extreme they break some sort of standing record or other) and revellers will brave "one of the worst winters in recent memory"
- Last-minute canapes in the Daily Mail, such as a Lidl prawn platter. Also served at the Mail's party are frozen mini-pizzas, mini chicken Kievs and mini frittatas
- Future gazing in the Independent. No entry-level 2010 predictions, these are for 2020, like see-through suitcases for airport security and a David Hare verbatim play at the National Theatre on Britain's Got Talent
- And bikini babes snapped sucking their tummies in while on winter sun breaks in the Sun
Happy New Year, one and all!
The 
