Your Letters
16:21 UK time, Friday, 13 November 2009
Re : If 10 of the 60 male staff members peeing on a hay bale has saved 30% of the estate's water consumption from flushing toilets, then the 50 female staff members must have been flushing less than half as often as their male counterparts. The complete opposite of every other house in the country.
Rob, Sheffield, UK
How can you possibly make John Humphreys' quip the quote of the day, when the contains this gem from Dimbles himself: "Trust my wife's bullock to take me out."
Tim Barrow, London, UK
An unfortunately placed bit of dirt on my computer screen had him being knocked out by his wife's buttock. I spent a few confused minutes wondering why it was being loaded on to a trailer in the first place.
Jim, Crowborough
. Mixing up Bert and Ernie. Unforgivable.
Rachel, Leeds
Monitor note: Am very, very ashamed.
This "experiment" is ridiculous. It has nothing to with the iPod, although admittedly the result "larger speaker sounds better than smaller speaker" wouldn't have the same cutting edge journalistic feel to it. If the iPod was plugged in to the large speakers the result would have been very different. Oh, and a sample of 10 data points is far too small to draw statistically valid conclusions. I'll get my note.#
Jonny, Leicester
Where are you Magazine Monitor? Isn't it bad enough that normally you discriminate against international readers by making it difficult to find you, now you've just gone off completely? Caption competition? Gone. Your letters? Gone. More about today's quote? Gone. Arghhhhhhhhhhh Am I supposed to work this afternoon? Is that it?
(Or is it just a problem with my computer?)
Meg, Geneva, Switzerland
Monitor note: It's not me, it's you.
If I could come out of retirement and say how chuffed I am to join Simon Rooke on 50 captions selected by the Monitor. I'd like to thank my little helpers who've been submitting on my behalf since I hung up my quill. They will now join me as I slip back into retirement. It's been a blast.
Stig, London, UK
May I just thank all those that enter the caption competition every week. They never fail to make me laugh, often long and loudly. Kudos to you all.
Tim Dennell
The 
