Paper Monitor
12:35 UK time, Wednesday, 18 October 2006
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Let's cut to the chase. There's only one important question being asked in the papers today - why have so many dogs leapt to their deaths off a certain bridge in Scotland? Last year five died this way in just one month, declares the Daily Mail .
Paper Monitor has a theory, could they be feeling the pressure of being such media stars? Just look at the papers, animals are everywhere. They feature in two double-page spreads in the Mail alone. Even the high-brow Times is sensible enough to sandwich a story about a three-legged tortoise in between all the politics and crime stuff. If Kate Moss or Madonna feel hounded - no pun intended - what about animals?
The Mirror and the Express do their public duty and expose a "politically correct waste of money". Refugees and asylum seekers in Coventry are getting free clown classes, costing taxpayers more than £2,000. The theatre company running the classes says the workshops will be fun and take people's minds of things - you know, like the persecution, rape and torture many have suffered. Apparently, clowning is a very British thing. In PM's book that is one good reason to leave the country, not try to get in.
Scrabble is also causing a lot of outrage. "Violent and dangerous" prisoners are being paid to play it in prison and having "fun" at our expense, screams the Express. Can that really be true? PM has never had fun playing Scrabble and rather than calming people down, spelling rows have been known to send PM violent and dangerous. You've been warned.
Today's Guardian wallchart is dedicated to tomatoes. Salad greens tomorrow. Does life get any better?
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